Wednesday, May 02, 2007
queue for zhang shao han ticket. haha. had a hard time queue-ing. from 11.50am lidat queue until 1pm. den we got the ticket. can consider lucky lo. because those people behind couldnt get any. so consider ourselves lucky.
but there was something which i wanna voice out. something very very wrong with SPSU. there was this girl who couldn't speak in a correct manner and the way she says it seem so RUDE. i know it's kinda pek chek trying to make such a big crowd listen to you, but c'mon blame it on ur own system. no one takes the initiative to organise the whole queue-ing procedures and ppl can suddenly cut in so much.
anyway we've got the tickets, so let's jus forget abt this.
went to bugis after sch with von. bought a bag, and 4 tees. 2 for me and 2 for dear. slap me if you want, i just cant stop spending.
labour day was not a day for me to shop and go out...hmmm...next time i know le. i can only go out with girlfriends and nua at home with the boyfriend. if not there'll be endless of quarrels. both hates crowd and so...staying home is the best decision.
i was feeling terrible right now. flow last night was WEIRD. not my paranoid self but really weird. i saw the loss of so much blood...oh my!! i can never imagine.
somehow i think it's time i let them know, i can handle them financially but emotionally i cant. should i? i know everyone will say,'go and talk to ur parents'...how? i dun even know how i should start the conversation. everytime i see them, i'll imagine their expression when they heard of it, i'll imagine their reaction. i cant i cant i cant.
every single night...not once but every...i cried myself to sleep. i cant stop letting my imagination run wild and again...scenario on how the doc will be operating on my ovary to remove the cysts...i dun wan. i dun wan anyone to touch me i dun wan any weird instruments to get into my body.
i know i'll be fine after the operation but what abt my future? in a few years time, if the cysts grows again i'll have to remove it again. after operation i'll have to learn to get out of bed, to stand up to start walking once and again...the whole procedures is so tiring...
for i wish i was dead.
11:20 PM
