Saturday, May 27, 2006
so a house can eventually turn out to be a country club. ok fine. im fine with it. like i've said, i wun bother anymore. i jus hope tt u will meet with an accident on ur fucking way home. i told u i hate ppl who lies. so, wad u've done today totally show ur true colours. u wan know more gals right? ya, go ahead. i wun stop u. from today onwards i dun belongs to u, neither do u belongs to me.
i will lead my own path in life and u too. i cat accept ur character, neither could u accept mine. so tt's it. i dun care how much u come begging me not to leave u. my decision is final.
okay, so i thought i could lighten the loads in my heart by going for a scroll. but instead i came back with a heavier heart. i couldnt study at all. guys, i need guys to tk over him. not because i need a guy in my life, it's jus tt with another guy, i'll be able to forget everything tt's happening ard me. dun forget im a sagitaurus.
i felt so stressed recently. everyday i feel like crying. im sorry but im really suffering from depression. anytime anyday i will jus commit suicide. i jus dunno when. it's been with me for very long. i seek no medical attention. i dun consult a counseller. accumulations of the daily stress can force me to do sth which may hurt my family members, which i dun wan to. but who the hell cares? i dun even know who to talk to. im like living in a world of my own.
i wan to make myself drunk, but beer can cause beer belly which i hates. i wan all my sorrows to jus go away. i wan everyone to leave me alone. i wan to isolate from everyone. i jus simply wants all my problems to go away. i dun need concern, i dun need sympathy. i hates to get so emotional. but if i dun blog it down, i really dunno who to talk to. no one have time for me, no one can hear me vent. no one. not even a soul. not even a ghost.
i wish god can tk me away from all these sorrows. i wish god would show sympathy for me, to let me leave here peacefully. i wish my god father can slap him awake. ask him to fuckingly wake up n stop hurting me. i wish my god father know tt im not happy in this r/s, i wish he could pull me thru, i wish he's in spore at this moment so tt he can protect me away from all this dangers and loneliness.
9:05 PM
